Friday, July 17, 2009

the lip capade

I've been so busy. Crazy busy as I call it. I had just a little bit of time to post on facebook, but I'm finally getting a chance to get the 'LIP CAPADE' on the blog.

Last friday started off with a day off from work. Mom, Aunt Carole, Liz and I were going to spend the weekend in Dallas shopping. Last week was really slow at work so I took Friday off as well. I got up early to get some things done around the house. I should have stayed in bed.

I went in the backyard to water my plants. I was tugging the hose out of its reel when it came back and hit me smack dab in the middle of my upper lip. Nice, I thought. I'm going to have a fat lip in Dallas. Well, at least I'll have another funny story for the blog.

I've always disliked my thin upper lip. I was looking forward to seeing what it would look like. So I took a picture:

Little did I know this would get much worse.

4-5 hours after impact--I call this my platypus look.
NO PHOTOSHOP
THIS IS REAL
I spent the entire trip to Dallas with ice on my lip and downing advil. See how much it helped?
I called Cindy and Rebecca about 30 times once it got to this point. I was FREAKING OUT!! A hit on the lip from the metal end of a hose should not make your lip this big. We think I was allergic to something. Either the latex on the hose or something that was on the hose. But I'm not sure. Let's just hope it doesn't happen again anytime soon.
Me trying to hide my lip while at Chuy's.
Yes, I went out in public looking like that. And yes, people stared.
Liz laughed at the response I gave people. If I caught them looking at me, I would make my lips even bigger and glare back.
I really needed a sign or tee-shirt to explain. Here are a few of my ideas:
Yes, I realize my upper lip is GINORMOUS
No, I am not an abuse victim
Yes, I am taking medication for this
Less than 24 hours later, my lip was back to normal.
But the next 9 days on steroids, were, well, interesting. My co-workers were really tired of me re-arranging the pencils and note pads on their desks. And I paced alot. And my appetite. I, however, bought candy for the office because if I was getting fatter, everyone else was too!!
Three good things came out of this experience:
1) I realized I could be uglier.
2) I do not need silicone, ever. Anywhere.
3) The First Wives Club should've used me for that opening scene; I could've been a millionaire. Or on HITCH.
4) My cabinets are very clean and organized after a 9 Day course of Prednisone.
I've always been a positive thinker and boy can I laugh at myself.
We're even thinking about making Platypus Sarah masks for Halloween. We'll see. . . .
Hope you enjoy the laughs! And next week can't get much worse. I'm on vacay with the family at Lake George, Co. My PA friend, Rebecca, and her family are letting us stay at their cabin. We are so blessed! Thanks Rebecca!

2 comments:

Courtney said...

wow! seriously. that was so ridiculous I am not sure I believe it...even though I see it. You have to be kidding me!?! Seriously? I know I am repeating myself. You have me laughing hard over here. I loved your t-shirt ideas too!

Rick and Kylee said...

you are the best!